What’s the Point of a Relationship—Really?
There are reasons for being in a relationship — and while you may not experience all of them at all times, the pursuit of these things is the goal. If one or more are consistently missing, it’s worth asking: what’s the point of having a partner?
Some of these needs can exist without others, but many are deeply connected—some can’t truly exist without the rest.
- Emotional Support — someone to talk to, be vulnerable with, and feel genuinely understood by.
- Companionship — sharing life, experiences, memories, and purpose so you’re not navigating it alone.
- Intimacy — physical closeness, affection, and love that deepen emotional connection.
- Growth — relationships should help you evolve—become more self-aware, more patient, more grounded.
- Partnership — someone to build a life with through shared responsibilities, goals, family, or long-term vision.
These needs overlap. You can’t fully have intimacy without emotional support, and growth often stems from meaningful companionship and challenge. When one is consistently missing, it can weaken the others.
A good partner won’t always get it right, but over time, they should learn how to support you better. They should be able to help you think through what you need, ask the right questions, and understand whether you need closeness or space. The goal isn’t perfection—it’s the pursuit of connection, understanding, and growth.
They may not always be able to fix everything, but the ability to recognize your emotional state is comforting in itself. Validation matters—even for irrational feelings. Your partner doesn’t have to agree with how you feel, but they should understand your experience so you never feel alone in your own reality. That’s what creates emotional safety and lasting connection.
Questions to Reflect On:
- Are these expectations realistic, or are we chasing an ideal that no one can consistently meet?
- How do you cope with the gap between what you need and what your partner is capable of giving—especially when you’ve already been let down?
- Can love still feel fulfilling when it’s imperfect, or does unmet need slowly become resentment?
